For the first time in my twenty-four years on this earth, I’ve been indoors for what feels like an endless amount of time and although I did want this at one point in my life, I have learned the importance of creating and giving importance to a space for yourself when that is all you have.
Growing up, space was something that was shared. In the Philippines, there were always people around and most Filipinos set their home up for the best hospitality a person can offer and experience. It’s an environment that favours the social part of being human. On the other hand, living in Canada, I’ve learned to value individuality and even prefer it at times. I feel as though my Filipino self is open and friendly but my Canadian self is an introvert that finds reading alone on a Saturday night fun. (It’s true when they say that your personality changes depending on what language you speak!)
In the last two years, it wouldn’t be so far-fetched to say that in our collective solitude, we have learned more about ourselves than at any other time in our lives. As hard as it is for many of us in these uncertain times, it’s important to be able to focus our efforts on something that we can control to give us some sanity. What better way to express our frustration than to give importance to the space around us. Not only is it a fun way to pass the time but it’s therapeutic and simultaneously brings peace in our daily lives.
When I first started putting importance into my space at a younger age, I only thought to follow an ideal aesthetic I desired to be surrounded by. I added colours I liked in my room, bought candles to make my space smell nice, added posters of my favourite bands, etc... As I got older, however, I started to value things outside just the appearance of my room and the pandemic was the perfect time to accommodate this change within me that I wanted to bring into my space.
At the start of the pandemic, the first lockdown gave me time to reflect on my values and personality. Before the pandemic, I was scatterbrained and disorganized. My room reflected that as well. As pretty as my room was, I started to realize that as much fun as prioritizing aesthetics is, creating a functional space for yourself is just as important, if not more. After taking the time to bring forth the newfound values within myself to my space, it began to reflect in my behaviour as well. Picture how your day would be impacted if you woke up and had to rush to work - instead of looking for things you need, you would have the time to make a cup of coffee instead! When I used to be disorganized, I acted moody and stressed. Now that I feel like I have control of my space, I became more calm and dependable. I’m surprised by how such a small task helped me with my daily life and grow as a person.
When you can hardly control anything in the world and everything is at a standstill, being able to create your sanctuary is a blessing. No one knows how long we have to take extra precautions to be safe- it's anyone's guess! What helped was focusing my efforts on things I can control. During the first lockdown in Toronto, I spent a lot of time sifting through my entire house, organizing my belongings, and letting go of stuff that was just taking up space. It was therapeutic going through old belongings that held memories and in this state of reflection, I started to learn how much value my own space was and how much power I had in being able to manifest a dream space for myself! It took quite a long time and after moving to another home recently, my space is now dedicated to everything that gives me inspiration, peace, comfort, and ease. I spend a lot of time cleaning diligently and making sure my things are organized and ready for my busy life. I never know what tomorrow might bring but at least I know exactly where to find my lip gloss!
I learned that life will always have obstacles (duh!) and there are ways to make it easier for yourself when “life happens.” In Tagalog, we say, “Ganyan Talaga,” or, "It is what it is.” I used to be in a setting where all I longed for was a space for myself and now that I have one, I miss being surrounded by people all the time. We can never control what happens in life but we have to give importance to what we can control. Our space is an extension of ourselves. So give importance to yourself and your space today! Learn to enjoy your space (if you’re not already) and be open to being surprised at finding out something new about yourself and/or revisiting something you may have forgotten about yourself. This time may feel endless but there’s an end to everything. Doesn’t that make you want to make the most of it?
(The title is inspired by Virginia Woolf who expressed it perfectly when she wrote her novel, “ A Room of One’s Own,” in the 1920’s when she wrote about how important it is for female writers to have their own space in order to write. This article is dedicated to her efforts in fighting for women’s rights and visibility in literature.)